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FROM THE EDITOR
Americaís Future
JR Dieckmann

Just forget everything you knew about America. The American voters and the Washington power brokers have decided that America should become a socialist country. I turned on the news this morning and wondered if I had woken up in Russia as I listened to people praising the virtues of these people still left in the presidential race. With a socialists and a Marxist running for president on one side, and one just slightly to the right of them running on the other, it looks like the America we all knew and loved is gone, maybe for good. But itís not all bad.

You people who want a nanny government to take care of you and run your lives are in luck. This is your dream come true. You should realize, of course, that you will no longer have the freedom to grow and develop to your full potential and reap the profits of your hard work. The government will need that money to redistribute to causes they feel are more important than any use you may have for it. You wonít need that much money anyway because there will be few places to spend it.

If you are a payroll worker then a large portion of your pay will have to go to help those less fortunate than yourself, but remember, it's all for the common good. From each according to his ability, to each according to his needs. All Americans are born equal and we're going to make sure they stay that way for the rest of their lives. Just think of how nice it will be to no longer have to compete with anyone for anything. You will get your fair share just like everyone else.

If you would rather not work at all, that's okay too. The government will have plenty of money taken from those who earned it, to take care of you and we will have plenty of illegal aliens to do the work that you don't want to do. By the next election, they will all be registered voters and assure that the awful concept of capitalism and competition will never return to America.

And just think of how wonderful it will be to run your car on that corn that we used to use for food. And we will no longer have to eat those awful vegetables that used to grow in the fields that will now be producing the corn. You will even be able to drive for 35 miles on one gallon of corn in you 50 horsepower car. Won't that be nice? But it wonít be necessary because there will be no place for you to go. Anywhere you might go will be just like where you came from, so what would be the point?

And just think, we wonít have to see those terrible oil platforms 5 miles off our coastlines, dig those nasty holes in the Rocky Mountains, disturb the caribou in the remote regions of Alaska, or worry about those dangerous nuclear power plants that are always blowing up and spreading radiation all over our cities. As we play in the recent snowfall across the nation, we wonít have to worry about the planet burning up from the emissions of cars and industry, there just wonít be that many of them left. And at the same time we can give all that extra money we have to less developed nations to help them become just like us.

How nice it will be to sit around under the trees with our friends and neighbors, eating the fruits and berries and singing cum-by-ah while watching our lives go by. No more worries about war and terrorism, all that will end if we just ignore it. We can all be just one big happy family without worries or cares and the world will love us and leave us alone just as long as we follow the dictates of our government like herds of sheep.

Yes, life will be good, except for those who really want to accomplish something with their lives or take a different path. Those people might become a problem that the government will have to fix. They will have to learn that right thinking will be rewarded but wrong thinking will be severely punished.

Yes, we can have this dream utopia as long as we continue to vote the right people into office. Nice going, America. You are making the pipe dreams of John Lennon and Karl Marx come true within our lifetime. And soon, America will be just like both Lennon and Marx, dead. And wonít that be wonderful? A dream come true.